Area Man’s Attorneys Claim Victory in Copyright Infringement Dispute with Local Man

Local Man Ordered to Cease to Exist

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The iconic every man, Area Man, a licensed and copyrighted property of the theonion and, has reclaimed his place as the only legally allowed abstract representation of the average man in humor writing. The ruling by area judge Thomas Thurgood left no room for dispute by saying in his ruling…..”To suggest that local man is anything other than a lame attempt at a humorous abstract representation of a normal everyday man, is nothing short of absurd. It is obvious to this neighborhood guy that local man is clearly infringing on the copyright protections afforded area man under US law. Therefore this district circuit court rules in favor of area man and sentences local man to complete and total banishment from any and all humor writing for a period of no less then ten years.” With that indigenous resident Thurgood slammed his gavel, stood and turned, and slowly walked out the back of the courtroom.

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Research scientist (Ph.D. micro/mol biology), Thought middle manager, Everyday junglist, Selecta (Ret.), Boulderer, Cat lover, Fish hater

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