Pro-Tips for Nailing Every Doctor Patient Interview

These days it virtually impossible to get a prescription for effective and safe painkillers. It turns out that despite what your doctor and/pharmacists told you, they were almost certainly lying. There is a class of medicines called the opioids. I’m sure you have at least of heard of them. Normally one would expect to get their information on treatment options directly from their friendly family doctor. If there is a safe and effective medication available your doctor will write you a prescription and off you head to the local pharmacy to fill er up. The opoids are a different matter entirely. You see your good friend Uncle Sam has decided that for our own good we must be protected at all cost from the deadly surge in very safe and highly effective medicines. Therefore our good uncle and a few of his best buddies traveled all around the country to gently remind (forceably threaten) them of just how dangerous these medications really are. It turns out that a medicine can be a little too safe and a little too effective. Catch my drift? wink wink. If you are the type of person who finds effective medications of the extra safe variety a little too much you may be driven to seek out other effective medications and then even more effective medications. The madness won’t stop until you either end your obsession with the effectiveness of a medication and focus more on value capture ad projections. No one ever got addicted to that shit.

Well Uncle Sam wanted to make sure our fine American doctors truly had taken to heart his message so he continued speaking a bit. OK docs I get you are all smarty pants with that education but there are certain things and education can’t do. Two big ones is protect you from arrest and keep you out of jail. I know we all agree these damn opioids are a scourge of evil turning our children into little gay homicidal satans one pill at a time. However, I could not get my namby pamby liberal friends to agree to the sensible solution of a total an absolute ban. They kept whining something about but what will our cancer patients do? Boo-hoo. Same thing they did back in my day. Wither away and die slowly and in agony. Intense suffering just before you die is the single easiest way to guarantee easy entry to heaven. Anyhoo I struck a deal with those whining babies that tightened things up a bit but basically still relied ultimately on the good judgment of the prescribing….zzzz…doc…zzz.

What was I saying. Yes. If you read the Reg’s and I’m guessing some of you may you will see that you in fact can prescribe these medications when they are the best last options in cases acute and chronic severe pain. You will ignore that, you can no longer prescribe these medications at all, good day.

How did this get published? This was in my drafts for over a year. Weird. Pocket publish I guess. Oh well. Still timely though fortunately for myself my own pain has been well controlled (knock on wood) without medication for many months now. I still feel so much sorrow for the millions of other people suffering from chronic pain. Their pain is made worse by this countries’ crazy anti drug paranoia and ridiculous policies in that regard. Setting any regulatory policy based on who screams the loudest, instead of what the science says, never turns out well. Case in point.

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Research scientist (Ph.D. micro/mol biology), Thought middle manager, Everyday junglist, Selecta (Ret.), Boulderer, Cat lover, Fish hater

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